Thursday, 12 July 2018

Making Time For Yourself*

So I'm gonna start this post by making a statement:

Taking time out for yourself isn't selfish.


So why do we think it is?

Why is it that you're considered selfish if you do things solely for yourself?

It's a strange concept isn't it? And also kinda stupid.

Nourishing your mind, body and soul is not a bad thing and we need to ditch the idea that we are less deserving of our own love and time. We matter just as much as anyone else.

A quote that particularly resonates with me is "You can't pour from an empty cup" because it's so true. If you're not full of love you simply can't give it.

Self love is something I've had a lifelong battle with because the person I dread spending time with is myself. Don't get me wrong, I'm more than happy in my own company. In fact I prefer to be alone than surrounded by people but in terms of self love, I hate it. I always feel like there are so many other things I should be doing. I feel like there's a massive to do list and I'm wasting time on myself.

But that time is far from wasted. A little bit of self love goes a long way and once you've done whatever it is you need to replenish yourself you realise just how in need of your own love and care you were. I always notice when I haven't done something for myself because I just burn out.

This lovely mug was sent to me by the wonderful Helen Russell Creations and I believe it depicts my future self.
Cuddling cats and drinking hot chocolate is a great act of self love. 


My favourite perhaps. I absolutely love her website so I highly recommend you go check it out.

Self love doesn't have to be big. It's the small things I appreciate.
A nice bubbly bath with candles lit, making my favourite meal/snack, taking a nap, taking time out to solely listen to my favourite songs/albums and really immerse myself in them, setting some new goals, colouring in, grabbing your favourite hot drink and snuggling up with a book. Just doing things that I appreciate and enjoy. Things that are separate from my everyday life and that I usually don't have "time" to do.

Well make that time. Find it. It's there.
You deserve to be loved especially by yourself.

Self love to me is all about living as yourself in that moment. It's about learning who you are and accepting that person in a positive way. In those little moments when you take a break and you search to find what you love and what makes you happy it helps you realise what the essence of you really is and distinguishes your truth from that of those around you. It's the simplicity of knowing yourself and understanding that you, along with everyone else, deserve to feel loved and be surrounded by love and that all starts with you.

 I asked some lovely women on Instagram and Twitter this question:
What does self love mean to you?

Here are some of the responses I got:

Abi said: "Learning to accept myself and love myself as I am without apologising for it to anybody. Being happy in who I am and what I have to do to become a better me. Recognising that for me to glow and grow, I need to love myself and give myself credit. Recognising that I need to love myself enough to leave behind negative and toxic relationships/friendships in order to save my mental health. Self love is caring about yourself and loving who you are no matter what"

Kirsty said: "Self love to me means taking time to yourself to do something you love like reading a book or going for a walk in the sun. It is also allowing yourself to be selfish every so often and surrounding yourself with people who make you happy". 

So I ask the same question to you: What does self love mean to you?




16 comments:

  1. I think it means shutting down all the outside world and really introspect. If I think about it, even taking a bath is a moment when you're relaxing and without any distractions just think and introspect. I think self-love is crucial in the time we live in. You wrote a great post, I really enjoyed reading it and it made me think of what I can do more to share some self-love with myself.
    Dorota
    www.fetchcandle.wordpress.com

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    1. Thank you for your kind words Dorota x

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  2. I feel like I have so much to do all the time that I always feel guilty when I decide to take a moment for myself. Lovely post!

    Angela | DreamsAndLashes.com

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    1. Most people do but making time for yourself in a busy world like this is crucial. I really notice when I haven't stopped to take a break.

      Thanks for reading x

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  3. Loved this post honey! I don't get much time for myself usually but yesterday was spent taking a nap and then spending a few hours finishing my book with a takeaway for tea. I definitely feel so much better today so I agree taking time out for yourself is so important sometimes!!

    Jess // foundationsandfairytales.wordpress.com
    xx

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    1. Thank you Jess, it really makes a difference doesn't it?
      There's always a way of squeezing some time for yourself in. It's just about finding small things you like and can do in a short time frame.

      Glad you're feeling better today!

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  4. To me self-love is about being as kind to yourself as you would be to a good friend. Many seem to think it's about pampering ourselves with bubble baths and the like and that's really not what we need. What we need is to be understanding of ourselves, to accept our shortcomings, to forgive ourselves when we make mistakes - that kind of thing. No amount of indulgences will provide the same comfort as an accepting, honest, supportive relationship with the real you!
    Joan Senio
    Kindness-compassion-and-coaching.com
    @joansenio1

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    1. You definition is spot on. Some of the things we do and say to ourselves we wouldn't dream of saying to our friends. We are out biggest commitment in life and have to treat ourselves right.

      I think that indulgences can be a part of self love alongside accepting yourself. It's all about balance as with everything.

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts x

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  5. Loved this post and loved the crazy cat lady mug too, how perfect is that! I think self-love is so important, my favourite thing to do is have a bath and watch some YouTube or listen to music, it’s super relaxing and I always look forward to it at the end of a busy day. Thank you for the great reminder Louisa <3 xx

    Bexa | www.hellobexa.com

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    1. Good, I'm glad you make time for yourself.

      Thanks for reading x

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  6. I really enjoyed reading this, I think self love and self care are so important and also quote similar, you need to look after yourself and love yourself. I have had a look at her website and she does some lovely mugs xx https://lifeofshar.co.uk/

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    1. Thank you. Glad you enjoyed reading this post :)

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  7. This is oh so very true. I feel a lot of the time people just get so caught up in every day life and helping their loved ones that they forget about themselves. I know I do when it comes to helping my partner and family. But it’s so important to just take half hour of each day at least just to focus on yourself.xx

    angelwingsandpetticoats.com

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    1. Absolutely. We are all worth our own time.

      Thanks for reading x

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  8. Learning to do what I need to do for myself is something I've really been working on in the last year or so! I'm still not where I want to be but I'm getting there! I'll take a nap if my body feels like it needs one, I'll have some chocolate if I'm craving it and I'll completely switch off and play Sims for HOURS if I feel like I should <3

    Jenny
    http://www.jennyinneverland.com

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    1. I think we all need to listen to our bodies more too. If it feels like it's struggling then take time for yourself. Having a nice long nap is great.

      (The Sims is great. I could spend hours on it too)!

      Thanks for your comment x

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